Becoming Me: On Heartache

“Scars mean you fought. Wrinkles mean you lived. Heartache means you loved.” ― Matshona Dhliwayo

I bear the scars from my relationship. I know that many of you bear scars as well. I can say that I truly fought for the man I loved. I fought for our marriage. We attended group counseling, went to relationship conferences, read books, filled out workbooks, prayed, cried…I don’t know what more I could have done. We had years of conversations as I struggled to understand how he could hurt me over and over again, and still proclaim that he loved me. If relationships could be saved by having conversations, ours would have been saved.

God knows I went through the heartache, as many of you are experiencing now. But this is what I want to share with you: I don’t regret loving! I loved my husband with every part of me. I withheld nothing from him. Loving made me stronger, in many ways it showed me the best version of myself. To freely love someone is to be open to being loved in return.

Though my marriage came to an end, I discovered what my heart is capable of. It is capable of passionate, unyielding, enduring love. And though it ached, I knew it would love again. Know that despite the pain you are experiencing, your heart has shown you that it is truly capable of extraordinary love. And my prayer for you is that when you love again, it will be a love that endures the test of time!

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